Crimes against the Law (Law x Reader)

“Hey Shachi, Penguin, come here, I have a proposition for you guys.”

The two men looked at you questioningly, slightly apprehensive to actually get involved with your schemes. Sure they were generally harmless enough, but purposely aggravating their Captain was not really that high on their list of things to do. Who were they kidding, it was the number one thing on their list of things to do, but your schemes always took it a step too far and they would much rather keep all their limbs this time.

“Oh, come on, he really wasn't even that mad about the bear ears last time.”. You said, trying to coax them over.

“Initially no... but then you had to open your big mouth and set him over the edge.”

“But…” you started defensively, “... I was the only one punished for that, so you guys have nothing to worry about.”

Shachi gave you a knowing grin, “So what you're saying is... you enjoy his punishments?”

A playful smile crossed your face, “You mean you don't?”

Penguin shuddered at the thought, “I don't even want to know…”

Deciding it was probably a safe bet that you would be the only one punished for whatever shenanigans you had in mind, they decided to chance it for an opportunity to successfully mess with their Captain. “So what did you have in mind?”

Pulling out a piece of paper you handed it to them. “These are just a few ideas I have… as you can see the first two are already done...”

“Okay…”  Shachi says as he unfolds the paper.  Letting out a laugh as he reads it over.  

“We can't do number ten.” Penguin said attempting not to snort. “That’s just mean.”

You pouted, but conceded. “Fine. I prefer him fluffy anyway… So are you guys in?”

Handing you back the paper they both nod, shaking your hand.  “Welcome aboard the Law defying partnership… where we shall be committing crimes against the Law.”  You declared, grinning mischievously.  

“So many outLaw puns to be had…” Penguin added, with a smile.

“So many indeed.”  You agreed.

“So… where are we going to get that many Law, books?” Shachi asked, “He's spent over ten years amassing that collection…”

“I'm working on that.” You state, “I have about eight volumes of maritime law books, I’m working on getting a few more.  Although finding space to store everything is starting to become a problem, so we probably won’t be able to accomplish that until we meet back up with Luffy and I can access Robin’s library.”

“So we start on number four?” Penguin suggested.  “I mean we could probably help you steal his hoodies, but he’ll eventually notice… and honestly we were never successful at actually holding onto his things, stupid Ope Ope no mi abilities…”

“Well… I’ve been working on that too.” You said with an impish smile.  “I’ve been asking him to borrow hoodies every so often, ‘forgetting’ to ever return any… I have about five.”  

“And he never asks for them back?”  Shachi asked, perplexed.  

“Eh, he makes off handed comments about how I still have the previous one, and I end up making excuses about how I got it dirty or ripped and am in the process of mending it… or something… he usually shrugs it off and gives me another one.”  

“Wow, okay…” Penguin said, somewhat surprised.  “So… what are we going to do for pink feathers?”

“I got that covered.”  You replied triumphantly.  “I just need help with the attaching them to the hoodies… and well acquiring more hoodies…”

Shachi gave you an impressed look. “Where did you acquire that many pink feathers?”

You giggled. “Well… there happened to be a flamingo habitat on the last island we were on.”

“Really? I was not aware of that.”

“Umhmm,” you hummed with a nod, “Thousands of flamingos… I managed to get away with a couple of bags stuffed full of feathers.”

Shachi and Penguin burst out laughing, “I can't believe he let you into the sub with all that…” Shachi said breathlessly.

“I'm surprised he even let you back onto the sub at all, after that bear comment…” Penguin added.

“Well… he didn’t actually let me onto the sub with the feathers, I had roped Zoro into bring that on board for me, by offering him a bottle of sake... nobody ever bothers to question Zoro, besides I was a bit indisposed… and well let's just say Law didn't really have a choice but let me back on due to a medical emergency…” You said scratching the back of your neck.

“Medical emergency?”

“Let’s just say… flamingos are hella violent birds, and one should not attempt to steal four sack full of feathers from them…”  You said shuddering from the memory.  

Shachi doubled over laughing, “So what you’re saying is… you were attacked by a flock of flamingos.”  

“You know what Shachi, you won’t be laughing like that if you were there… those birds are vicious.  Good thing your Captain showed up or I might be dead right now, DEAD.”  

“You might be dead when he finds out what you’re planning.”  Penguin offered with a laugh.  

“Very true, but it would be worth it.”

“Really?  How so?”  Shachi asked, wiping the tears from his eyes.  

“Oh he’s so much more fun when aggravated.”  You replied, with a smile that made them wish they never asked.  

“SO MANY FEATHERS!”  Penguin whinned about an hour and a half into the feather sewing party the three of you were having.  

“C’mon, last hoodie for the day!”  You said encouragingly as you finished up with the hoodie you had in your hands.  In an hour and change the three of you had managed to almost finish up with the stack of hoodies you had stowed away.  All you guys had left was the quarter of a hoodie Penguin had left to finish off.  Tossing the hoodie you just finished aside, you helped Penguin sew together a mesh of feathers for him to then apply to the very last section.  

“So what’s the plan for getting the rest of his sweatshirts?”  Shachi asked, stuffing loose feathers back into the sack they were pulled from.

“I don’t know… when’s laundry day?  Maybe you guys can use that excuse to grab a few… I’ll work my magic to get a couple more, but even I’m not confident that he’s willing to give up anymore to me.”

“What we really should try to figure out is how to shield his stuff from his ROOM… that would save us so much trouble.”  

“Alas, with his scan ability, there’s absolutely no place to hide anything.  Let’s just hope we can finish before he notices.”  

“They hell?”  Law spat when he opened his armoire and was met with an empty wardrobe.  Activating his ROOM, he did a quick scan and then shambled all his clothes back from their hiding space in your room.  As all his hoodies came raining down upon him, a scowl formed on his face as he eye twitched.  There were pink feathers everywhere.  “(Y/N)-YA! I’M GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU!”

You poked your head into his room, grinning madly at the flurry of pink feathers surrounding him. “Hey now, as long as the fucking comes before the killing, it’s all good by me.”  You quipped before taking off running, even though you knew there was no escaping his ROOM.